Valentine’s Day eh, that time of year when stores shove heart shaped crap in your face, people start writing little love notes like they’re still in primary school, and social media turns into a bragging contest of who loves who the most.
But this year, we also got a rom-com slasher horror film released called Heart Eyes, and I went into this film not expecting too much to be honest, but I am always ready to be surprised.
The story follows Ally (Holt), who works in advertising, specifically, she’s trying to pitch a jewelry campaign themed around doomed lovers, and her boss thinks it’s not a good idea, which is fair because nothing says “buy our jewelry” like “look how horribly these couples died.”
Ally is also dealing with her own breakup as well, and her ex has already moved on, which only adds to her existential crisis.
Enter Jay (Gooding), who is a smooth-talking marketing guru who’s brought in to help clean up the mess, and surprise, he’s into Ally, and she, of course, is not having it, because the last thing she needs is more romantic nonsense.
Just when you think it’s setting up to be your standard rom-com where they bicker for an hour and then inevitably hook up, the Heart Eyes Killer shows up to ruin everyone’s day.
This lunatic has one mission: slaughter couples in the most brutal ways possible, and I’m talking full-blown horror movie carnage, the kind that makes you both cringe and cheer at the same time, so now, Ally and Jay are running for their lives while also trying to make sure they don’t accidentally fall for each other.
The movie leans into both genres without half assing it, and we have the rom-com moments that are properly cheesy, while the horror is quite gruesome at times.
Holt and Gooding have decent enough chemistry and work well together and are pretty entertaining, and the side characters are pretty decent as well, especially the detectives trying to catch the killer.
The Heart Eyes Killer, who wears a dingy yellow mask with glowing red heart shaped eyes is fairly cartoonish, but he still has that presence you want from a killer at the same time, and I loved some of kill scenes in the film, and it’s not just mindless slashing, as we get some good scenes from all parties in these moments of the film.
The biggest negative about the film for me was it was that it was quite predictable, and the reveal at the end was not great and I think could have been a lot better, but I also think that predictability is also part of the charm the film is aiming to deliver, as it's a film that doesn't take itself too seriously.
Overall, Heart Eyes is exactly what it sets out to be, which is a fun, self aware, dumb, cheesy horror flick.
It’s got romance for the people who want it, gore for the people who don’t, and enough humor to keep it all moving, and I have to say I had some good fun with this film, and while it's no Scream, it was worth the watch.
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